Hello pumpkin. I know I've neglected you over the years with all the cheating I've been doing on your mother. However, she and I had a discussion last nite after our make-up sex. It has been brought to my attention that you are entering adolescence and as any concerned father would do, I feel it is time to discuss the "birds and the bees" with my little girl!
You are entering a pivotal point in your life. As you begin your transition into womanhood, you will experience physical, mental, and emotional changes. All those boys that you've come so accustomed to playing Dragonball Z with may suddenly become attractive and you may feel desires to engage in lude sexual behavior. I highly advise against this sweetie. For those same boys are also going through changes and as they do, they only have one thing on their mind: deflowering virgins.
I know this is overwhelming sweetie. But as a man, I feel it is important for you to be aware of these harsh realities. Now, as far as your physical changes are concerned, I do not want you to be saddened or upset if your breasts do not develop as quick as the other girls your age. Please understand that every girl develops differently. In this day and age of celebrity obsession, I do not want you to get caught up in trying to be like the Kim Kardashians and Beyonce's of the world. The average woman doesn't look like that anyway, which is why those women are celebrities in the first place.
I would like you to watch this video. I know its a little dated, but the information contained within still holds true to this day:
Indeed, YOU ARE BECOMING A WOMAN! It is time for your mother and I to purchase training brassiers and tampax for our little EZ. Enjoy this time for it only happens once. Your mother will go into further details about your monthly cycle as she can explain it better than I can.
Tags: a, conversation, daughter, ez, heart, my, to, with
Replies are closed for this discussion.
Permalink Reply by SonGetWrec on 
Like THIS???
Permalink Reply by NATE \m/ (-_-) \m/ on Permalink Reply by SonGetWrec on YEAH U RIGHT
So Canada JUST got hip to Cypress Hill? Woow...that's just as bad as Guyana.
Permalink Reply by NATE \m/ (-_-) \m/ on 
Permalink Reply by EZBands make StillG.AY mom dance on CharlesGotFingered most definitely got downs syndrome. Charles doesn't know u dont have to read something to know how many paragraphs it has.. Pumpkin is the second word in his complaint (he also forwarded the link to Interpol).. doesn't mean I read your diary..
Anyway, niccas thought I was kidding when I told em Charles and Yayo's No Man wanna get married? Smh..
Permalink Reply by SonGetWrec on You Made Your Bed EZ, Now Die In It!
"I'm A Nightmare HUH?"-50 Cent 
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Permalink Reply by LX The Prince *Texans* on 
Permalink Reply by 1THUG aka PROJECK KEEM!! on “BUSTAZ AMBITION” remizzz by 1thug (SNIPPET ONLY...!)
[Intro: Some Ol Bish Sangin]
Light tha fire iss weeds in there
I boned ya mom in her derry air, DERRY AIR (OOH I NEED YOU!)
Light tha fire iss weeds in there I boned ya mom in her derry air, DERRY AIR (OOH I NEED YOU!)
YEAH, I need you, I need you to hate So I could use you for some levity
you know, diss real shet, feel diss!
[Verse 1: 1THUG]
THIS50 got ah thing for diss pranksta shet, dey love me
Cant dougie, bish fat~n~preggie, I put noogies on ha jelly belly (OOOOOOOOOH)
I take a shet on ya halo, betch Im a vandal
Got tha silver duck tape on my eight speed bike handle
My bishes and ya wife bring amusement and shet
SO like B. PUMP in fatty rhymes and dimes, I holla "HANDLE THAT STICK!"
Look at me, this is ya wife I chose
Betchez around me so bold, man I dawg dum hoez (OOOOOOOOOH)
I built an empire off ya ho tha johns dont know
Imma get her man
I break that ho on streets and make her blow (OOOOOOOOOH)
Sit back, watch her churn and blow, slob it ho, pop tha ho
HO after HO, you know, homie Im just triple skeet, skeetin
Bishes be screamin, “I need to git tha good pipe!” (OOOOOOOOOH)
Tha skeezerz just creamin
Reveal my d!ck and pipe twots leaky, so you cant pee
Tha penitentiary is definitely in tha question for me..
[Chorus: 1THUG]
I want to grind my ding in ya wife
Ho I bust too (bust too)
Negga you get in my way while im grindin her spine
And I'll fugg you (fugg you)
I don't care if you cuumm bish or what you want
Betch I’ll fugg you (fugg you)
I want to grind my ding in ya wife
Ho I bust too (bust too)
[Verse 3: 1THUG]
Iss ah bustaz ambition, close your eyes lissen, see me shettin
ether thread pumpin, lame caught a dumpin, his mama means nuthin
she part of tha game, catch her on tha huffy switchin lanes
Or in tha k-mart switchin chains
she downgrade from sterling silver b.s to some mean b.s.
Rocks that she copped from tha costume jewelry spot
I got tha levity to win, Im full of that medicine
Play wit tha balls til you nauseous, bish slob on tha head again
I got plans to fake it, so I shet on ya drapes
Now I can invite yo a** out for ah skate
Them model chicks hit me up and they backs got scraped
Pour jiizzum on they tettaz, make some GoLEAN flakes
Im like tha B. most PUMPER imma playboy B
Blue Heff will tell you he aint got shet on me
Tha stans watch me, haters see they cant stop me
GAY-FISH pointin at me sayin, “look at his biggazz c.ock G!”
HELLO!
[Chorus: 1THUG]
I want to grind my ding in ya wife
Ho I bust too (bust too)
Negga you get in my way while im grindin her spine
And I'll f*** you (f*** you)
I don't care if you cuumm bish or what you want
Betch I’ll f*** you (f*** you)
I want to grind my ding in ya wife
Ho I bust too (bust too)
Permalink Reply by Still D.R.E on lol u STILL bodybaggin' this clown?..this niggah' STILL BREATHIN'?? this niggah' STILL TYPIN'?...AIGHT, i got sum RAID FOR THAT GUYANAN COCKROACH!!!
-bops head to that ambition of a hustla beat- 
TAKE THAT TAKE THAT TAKE THAT!!!!
Permalink Reply by SonGetWrec on 
ROFL!!! YEAH!!!
May 17, 2013 at 11pm to May 18, 2013 at 4pm – PIER 4
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